I cannot remember having to type harder words than the ones I am about to share but here goes. A few months ago, Poppa and I learned that all the stores in his market (which he is in charge of) would be sold to franchises. Since he is a corporate guy, this move effectively would leave him without a job. There were a few possibilities that one of the new franchisee companies would hire him though we were not crazy about the idea of being away from the corporation he has been part of for the last 16 years. We have raised our family as part of that company and the idea of leaving it was scary. So we waited and in the end we faced the idea of getting a severance package and going out on our own. I played with the thought of convincing Poppa to become a farmer with me fulltime but realistically we have a large family, with a mortgage to match and seeing as he likes to see what I do through this blog and not arm and arm in the dirt then that would have been a disaster.
Through some stroke of luck, though I know it is God’s plan, the severance package was not ordered and so his company kept him on helping out where ever they could use his talents. Then at a goodbye dinner, the Vice President of his company (a big national company) offered us a job, a great job but the catch was it was in another state. I turned it down immediately since the idea of leaving our life here was unimaginable and then the weeks rolled by as I ignored the elephant in the room and pretended that nothing would change…ever.
Then came the day when Poppa was asked to go help out in that state by that Vice President and that is when it happened. He got a job offer that he really wanted to accept. One that he needed to take because he is responsible for the well being of 11 people. He called me that morning 2 weeks ago as I headed to the store. I was driving out that day with dreams of our fall garden in my head and my biggest worry was what sweater I wanted to start knitting that weekend. In 5 minutes our life had changed. Suddenly and forever.
I ran to Alex’s job and sat in a booth in her section so I could cry on her shoulder. I ordered food and didn’t eat any of it. I hugged a few of her fellow coworkers and sat there feeling sorry for myself. I cried over leaving our land, our animals, our farm, our friends and church community and most of all I cried thinking of how I would miss my oldest daughter and that precious little boy in her belly whom I have yet to meet. Could I be that strong? Last year, it seemed unimaginable that I could be happy once Alex got married and moved to her own home. Last year at this same exact time I might add. Now this year, I will have to leave her and her baby and not just 15 minutes away but farther, much, much farther. I cried for all of my hopes and dreams here and for this land that I love so much, this place where I always feel centered and at home. I cried and cried and then I got over it.
I realized sitting in that booth during the lunch rush that Poppa has always supported me in my dreams, regardless of what they are. The fact that I live on a farm with a man who could care less what kind of chickens we have in the coop is a testament to the fact that he will gladly give up the world he wants to live in to live in the one that I do. Poppa has always done whatever he has to do to give me the life I want and so now I will go with him, we all will to support him in his pursuits. Its only fair.
Turning that page I must say that I loved my visit to Kentucky and so moving there won’t be so bad. It won’t be home but really where ever my babies and husband are, that is my home. I’m sure there will be moments when I won’t feel as positive or as strong as I do right at this moment but in life the only thing that is really for sure is change. Nothing ever stays the same and I have to remind myself to cherish the moments always because you never know what tomorrow will bring.
I had planned this blog post to be so different really but this is how I feel right at this moment, it is my reality. So for now I will leave it at that and I will start putting together my plan on how to move this big, beautiful family of ours to a new house and hopefully somehow a new home.
Wishing you the best on your move. It is hard to leave behid what you are familar with, what you've come to love and most especially the peole you can't take with you. It was like that for our family when we moved south about 8years ago. My heart feels for you. I am glad you liked Kentuky. We drove throughit this summer and we agree that it is lovely. God bless you on this new adventure!
Tricia, I am sorry to see you go. If you have time between now and when you leave, please remember to say goodbye to me and my family. I know we didn’t get to see each other much but we will miss you. God bless you; you’ll be in my prayers!
Moving is tough. I was in the Navy and moved constantly. Now we are settled near Knoxville, TN. If you are in town, let me know- I would love to share my home and go to Mass with you. I have a dear friend (and her hubby) who live in Louisville and they absolutely love it. She works at the Filson Historical Society- another awesome place for you to check out! 🙂 I will keep you and yours in my prayers.
Christy
Thank you Christy!!
Both you and your husband will be greatly missed. I know I loved working with your husband, he will do well no matter where he goes but I am still sad to see both of you leaving our area. 🙁 I am so happy I can keep up with you guys and your creativity through your beautiful blog!
Thank you Rebecca and I loved your homemade dress!!
Thank you! I have to say though, I love so many of your things so much more… 🙂 Your creativity inspires me as does your optimism and wholesome living.
I'm pregnant but I think I would have cried anyway reading this. I have always seen your love of your home and your land in what you write about it. I'm so sorry you must leave, but that is how it must be sometimes. Especially when you are blessed with lots of little ones depending on you and your husband, you must do what is best for them. And no job is not best. I will pray you find a beautiful farm in Kentucky.
I live in Cincinnati. Maybe someday we'll get to meet!
Emily, We will be going to Cinci about every two weeks 🙂
I am in the same place in my life right now. We have accepted. Job offer that will take us away from our home, family and friends. We have never lived anywhere else, but this adventure will be fabulous. All we need is our wonderful family to call our house a home 🙂 I will journey with you on your adventure while we endure ours as well. Good luck! And god bless you and your beautiful family 🙂
Oh gosh, hard to do but many more doors may open to you. And in this economic climate 'tis better to move to or with a job. Prayers that you will find something suitable for you all to live in, without too much stress, and that you will find a lovely welcoming church to aid you. Blessings…
Dear Tricia,
Your words brought tears to my eyes. I’m encouraged by your contentment as I know that we must be content as Paul tells us, but I’m learning the lesson myself these days as I walk through this life wanting nothing more than to please Him. You are such a beautiful witness. Thank you for penning these words exactly when I needed to read them. May you find peace in your soul with our great and mighty Savior as you make this life change. God bless!
Thank you Courtney!!
Tricia, posting to you from Texas, where we are trying to make our new home. I'll pray for you, and you pray for me, my friend. Moving is hard, but God as we know, is so good. Blessings to you and your sweet family.
Justy, You got a deal my friend! Hope to see pics of your new place 🙂
This is an example of how life is just learning over and over again that we must die to ourselves. You are inspiring and I am sure the strong faith and wisdom you express will sustain you through such a big transition. It is a blessing that your husband has a job, too!
You'll be moving closer to my stomping grounds! I'm about 3-3.5 hours away from Louisville, KY. I live in rural TN – on a 28 acre farm. I don't comment often, but I feel like we're on the same wave-length on so many things! We moved in December of last year to this farm about an hour away from our loved ones. An hour doesn't seem far, but it is when you need someone to watch the kids or you want to go to a store your new town doesn't offer (Whole Foods, Trader Joes – both an hour and a half away now.) I love the way you wrote this post. Honest, true emotions. You and your lovely family are in my prayers. +JMJ+
Wow, this is a shock. And just yesterday, (co-incidence? I think not!) a friend posted on FB about the very subject of change and I then reposted it: It's a spiritual look at what change is all about and how we can suffer because of it—or not! http://www.tricycle.com/dharma-talk/fundamental-a…
How exciting for you all! I know that sounds happy-dippy but you have already made the hardest/ easiest decision. It is hard to follow the hubby, hitch yourself to him but that's right-you & he are the center of your family, so your willingness to go where he goes is the best thing for your family! Kudos for the honesty in sharing how hard it was. We have moved to Oz -twice. Both times were so hard- the extreme distance from friends, family, pets, my home. But on the plus side-Skype! It is a lifesaver. But yes the "transplanting "part is tough. Packing, & all the attendat anexity will be hard, adjusting to the new place & people is easier then one day you wake up & know that home is the place where your family live, not a particular house or geographic location. Leaving a preborn grandchild will be much tougher, my first born had her first baby last year & we won't be going home till next year (after a flying visit when the baby was about 2 months old), so there is that heart-ache, but keep the calls, notes & homemade gifts going. I also found that praying for them at a special time each day (that I told them about), made me feel closer. God bless & good luck with your move!
Pam, Your words are very healing! thank you 🙂 I love the part about special prayer time too
You know I am praying for you. Please call me if you need to talk (and I still need to call you!). I am glad you wrote this post just as you did. You didn't try to paint blue skies and flowers but showed your true, raw emotions. Thank you <3
May God bless you on your new adventure! I don't envy you at all and since I moved quite a bit in my youth I know it will be very challenging, but you have such a strong faith and you always find the silver lining in everything, so I know God will bless your faithfulness to your husband and your family abundantly. I will be praying for you! God bless!
OH MY!!! I am so sad to read this, but happy for your new adventure. You are such an inspiring friend – I was so looking forward to our year at co-op so I could spend more time with you and learn more from you. My prayers will go with you.
you will be missed around here.
I will be praying for you and your family in this transition!
wow! what news! When I was eleven my family moved from Clearwater Florida to Juneau Alaska. It was a huge change and there were growing pains, but being together and facing those challenges as a family made it better. And hey! Kentucky is closer to Arkansas.. Maybe we will be able to meet up someday 🙂
WWWAAAAHHHHHhhhhhh!!!!! We dont get to see each other often enough, but i’m so sad that a kindred spirit will be moving away. Its a hot day out and it makes it feel colder already. The kids will certainly be disappointed. I still had so much to learn from you. Thank the good Lord for facebook to be able to keep in touch. Lots of good people in Kentucky though. You wont have a hard time making friends.